Ask the Death Note Cast!
by Kyoha Yagami
Summary: Light, L, Misa, Mello, Matt and Near are locked in a room. Now's your chance to ask them questions! Or, you can watch them go crazy from no food! Who know's? Hurry, they'll be released at the end of April!
1. Day 1

Author's Note: I thought I would start here with a simple questions and answers story. When I know that people like my style, then I'll start to post my stories that I have already typed up.

* * *

Light Yagami was on his way home to do some killing. With Misa by his side, cooing and flirting with him, he passed by a store of mirrors, and noticed that his hair was all messy. As he tossed his auburn locks back into place, he saw a hooded figure behind him. He turned around, and blacked out. Misa screeched but fainted, also.

"One more cake, please, Watari." L said simply. Watari replied with a "There is none left." L grunted and said that he'll get it himself. As soon as he stepped out of the hotel, a woman appeared and all he saw before he was knocked unconcious was a black heel.

Matt and Mello stared at their computers and multiple security camera monitors.

"Matt, I need more chocolate." he said as he tossed his last wrapper across the table and onto the floor, landing near the other seventeen or so golden and silver paper wads.

"Get it yourself." Matt retorted. Mello glared at his best friend.

"Only if you come with me." Mello pouted.

"Fine." Matt sighed heavily and grabbed his pack of cigarettes. Once they opened the door, a bag of sand from hot air balloons dropped onto them, causing them to faint.

"Rester, we need to go back to Japan again." Near said to the monitor with the man's face displayed. He was playing with his finger puppets and adding the finishing touches to the Mello puppet.

"I'll meet you at the airport then." Rester replied, and turned off the screen. Near packed up his toys, puzzles and pyjamas and headed towards the airport. But when he stepped outside, he was tripped and a figure stuffed him into a net.

Light, L, Misa, Near, Matt and Mello all stood in the white room, looking for a way out.

_"Hello." _A electronic voice spoke. It seemed to be coming from the ceiling.

"Where the hell are we?!" Mello yelled.

_"You're in a room. Duh. You'll live here in a month. There are only three beds, sorry. I guess the bed partners are Misa and Light, L and Near, and Mello and Matt." _

Mello glared at the speaker at the very top of the ceiling. A slot opened and a piece of paper fluttered down to the ground. Misa picked it up and read it aloud.

"Uhm... Please don't ask questions over and over again. If someone already asked it, don't ask it again." She pronounced each word carefully.

Light scowled, and asked, "What's your name?"

The voice paused for a minute, and then said, _"Kyoha."_

_"One more thing. People are going to ask you guys questions, so when they ask, another paper full of the questions will come down. The people will decide what you get when you answer!"_

'God, I wish I wasn't such an ass...' Light thought.

* * *

There you go! So, as I said, ask the questions and put anywhere after the questions what they get if they answer. But if it's about yaoi, they won't answer. So, readers and reviewers... Ask away!


	2. Day 2

Author's Note: Squee! Thank you so much! I never thought I'd get 5 reviews in one day! Thanks to SasatheShy, Neo-Kira, carelineparis, moonlightdemonKita and Detective Narricks, my first ever reviewers! You all get a box of cookies.

Oh, yes! I forgot something! If you don't like the character, you can give them something negative, like a kick in the shin or a slap in the face. Also, I forgot the disclaimer...

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note. If I did, Matt would get 5 chapters worth of appearences! And he wouldn't die.

* * *

Day Two:

_"You've got your first batch of questions." _Kyoha said cheerfully.

"From SasatheShy:

-evil snicker- hehehehe Waha! Sorry. -clears throat- Aww the poor cast of Death Note. I guess I should ask them some questions to help get them out of there. Sadly, I can't think of a questin for each of you -frown- so yu won't all get something But Oh well!

So...

L: Just wanna say I love you! -hugs and kisses- I coulnd't resist, no fangirl could. Anyways, My questions for you are: Why do you walk like a zombie? Would you go goth if offered many cakes? Cause I think you'd look good in black -wink- just don't pierce anything :)

If you answer these you get an enitre homemade vanilla cake with chocolate frosting made by me all to yourself -you don't have to share, and on't worry I'm a fantastic cook!-

Near: You're my second fave character next to L. You're such a cutie. My only question for you right now is what are your plans now that you've defeated Kira? -hope I didn't spoil!- o.0

Near, answer please and I'll give you two 10piece animal puzzles: a tiger and a shark one to work on! YEPS! You'll probably solve both in under fifteen minutes but oh well! :)

That's all :) And thank you! -bow-

Sasa

Light glared at the speaker. "What?! None for me?!" he yelled.

"Although I cannot receive a hug nor a kiss inside this place...thank you." L hugged the air. "I do not walk like a zombie, it is the fault of my curved spine. And no, I won't go goth for you." Half a cake fell from the air and landed into L's outstretched arms.

"...I'll probably solve both puzzles in under two minutes." Near sighed. "Well, my plans are cut off now, since I'm stuck in this place for the next month. And who knows? We might be here for a couple of months, depending on how Kyoha feels... Oh, and I'll pass on the puzzles." Still, twenty pieces fell from the ceiling again and landed at Near's feet. He picked at the orange and blue pieces and sighed a heavy one again.

"From Neo-Kira:

Call me Neo-Kira...My questions will be answered in standard turn based answers...  
Light or Raito which ever you perfer...Where can I obtain a trap like yours to protect my Deathnote?

Misa...Would you really give up half your life to meet Kira knowing that you would die early?

L...Do you fear Death?

Mello...This isn't a question...Stop being a royal pain in the ...  
And to the author...Where is Ryuk..."

Light thought for a minute. "Keep it with you at all times." he said simply.

"Misa-Misa gave up three quarters of her life to Light-kun!" Misa said cheerfully. "Misa will do anything for Light!"

L chewed his thumbnail which he swiped across the cake to catch the frosting. "Well, taking the Kira case already endangered my life. I had a 40 percent chance of dying while working on this case."

Mello yelled several cuss words. "I am not a effing pain in the ass! Tell me, how am I effing a pain in the effing ass?!"

Kyoha paused. _"Ryuk is there. You just can't see him." _A shiny, juicy, red fuji apple dropped from the slot. As it was six feet away from the ground, it moved around in a semi circle and was eaten bite by bite. Soon it was gone.

"From carelineparis:

Uhh. . .yeah! I get to ask you guys questions! Okay me and my sis will ask you this ah wait spelling it again. . . these!

For Light: (sorry but I'm a Kira fan!) If you had the chance (if ever) to like someone else who would it be? Please verify what type of person you REALLY want (no more like I want smart)

For L: Ever since you were little what do you really want to be when you grow up? Aside from being a detective.

For Matt: When did you start smoking? Please verify! 3

And lastly for Mello: Could you and my sis date? You both have the same hairstyles!

P.S. Light. . . if you answer my question properly, I might be able to have mercy on you! 3

TC, Peace! And God (not Kira) bless!"

"Your question isn't clear. If you add a "be" between to and like, you could ask me who is my role model. I take it that you're asking me who I love... And the answer is nobody. Women are a huge waste of time, and any idiot screws up when they fall in love." Light finished. Misa glared at him, her red nails shining. Like claws, she raised them up to neck-level.

L drooled from the cake and looked up to the ceiling. "What I wanted to be... I always wanted to be a baker... That way I could make all these cakes..."

Matt fell asleep in the corner and woke up with a shake from Mello. "Uh... I started smoking when I was 15 I think..."

"Seriously, I don't really care if we're clones, the answer's no. Plus, I'm in this place! How can I seriously effing date? No offense, but-"

Kyoha let a picture of the said sister flutter down into Mello's hands.

"...Maybe." Mello said once he took a look. "How old is she?"

"From moonlightdemonKita:

hi everyone -

ok um first things are not really questions

L. you are so awesome -  
Near, so are you and great job at solving all of it  
Matt, yea they dont really mention you in the anime series  
Mello, you are awesome too - great job to you too  
Misa, why the hell do you let light use you like that? kira or not you should punch him for all that crap  
Light, are you just crazy or something cause i didn't think it even possible for someone to be as much of an as you"

L, Near, Matt and Mello muttered a low "Thanks."

Misa looked horribly insulted. "Misa loves Light! Misa doesn't care if he uses me or not! Misa loves Light!"

L stuck his finger into his mouth absentmindedly. "But does Light love Misa?"

Light didn't answer to the question towards him. He was shocked that anybody would say something like that. (Meaning, Kyoha doesn't know what to write for that.)

"From Detective Narricks:

abuseL: Have you ever been in love with anyone? (Besides li-Shot)  
Answer and I will give you Cake!  
Light: Are you G-Shot Do you have your Death Note with you right now?  
Answer and you will get a surprise box!  
Misa: WHY ARE YOU SO ANNOYING!?  
Answer and And i'll make sure Light marries you!  
Near: Is your hair naturally white? Or did you dye it?  
Answer and You will get a box of legos!  
Matt: Who are you? Seriously. You wern't ANYWHERE in the manga.(To my knowledge.)  
Answer and you will get... What do you want?(Besides being let out of the room, of course.)  
Mello: Why do you sit so strangely and wear leather?  
Answer and you will get Chocolate!"

"One person at Whammy's house..." L muttered. (Once I post my first fic you'll see who!) Another cake dropped into L's arms and with a swift whoosh, he cut it into a slice.

"No, why do you ask?" Light obviously thought that the first question was "Are you God?"

After taking many 'insults', Misa started to cry. "Misa..." She repeated her name between sobs and hiccups. "Misa is annoying? Narricks-san does not like Misa's voice?"

"Yes, it's naturally white." Near said, playing with the 10 piece puzzles. A box of lego dropped down and Near immediately started to build a fort.

Matt scoffed and puffed on the cigarette (Where did that come from?) that dangled in his mouth. "Yes, I appear in the manga at least 10 times! And so I get more smokes... I'm Mello's best friend. I found him the year I started smoking."

"I wear leather 'cause it's effing cool, that's why! And I do not sit strangely! You wanna see someone sit strangely, look at Near!" Mello prayed for the chocolate to come, but a single bar dropped. (Heh, Mello torture.)

_"That's all the questions for today. Remember, review!" _The voice said.

* * *

Whew! Thank you so much, everybody! I don't think Misa can take anymore insults, and I know that Mello needs more chocolate! See you, everybody! Good bye!


	3. Day 3

Thank you for reviewing, everyone! This is my second time typing this chapter... It shut down without saving... -cries-

Thanks to Kayla Birde. I think I'll start typing the questions in italics. The reason that I didn't before is that italics doesn't show up on some browsers.

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note.

* * *

Kyoha began to hang out with the cast. Braiding Mello's hair into dreadlocks (More Mello torture!) she yelled, "New questions!"

"From Neo-Kira:

_...Neo-Kira has returned to deliver pirizes to those who answered his questions...  
Light recieves a pencil...  
Misa recieves two Light and Misa dolls to play with...  
L recieves two small cakes and a tray of tea...  
Mello recieves a phamlet on anger management and sandwich suppiles, good for three days of food...  
Kyoha recieves a copy of How to Read 13...  
...New questions remain...  
Light...Do you regret trusting Ryuk...  
L...Do you want a computer...  
Misa...If you could say anything to the Shinigami who gave his life for you, what would you say...  
Ryuk...Is living in the human world all you expected...  
Answer these questions and you will recieve more things to help you live...or die..."_

Light took the pencil and spun it. "What good is a pencil..." Misa squealed at her new toys and started to have Light and Misa make out, kiss and hug. L swallowed his two cakes and washed it down with a cup of tea. Mello tore up the pamphlet and yelled "I DO NOT NEED AN EFFING ANGER MANAGEMENT COURSE!"

"Squee!" Kyoha grabbed the book and opened it to Mello's page. She drooled, crunching on a grapple. (An apple with grape concentrate infused inside it. It's really good, actually.) Ryuk looked longingly at the grapple.

"No, I don't regret trusting Ryuk, because if it weren't for him, I wouldn't be the god of this world." He struck his pose with the open shirt flapping in the wind/OMG I HAVE WINGS/AH AM LIGHT, WATCH MEH FLY routine.

Kyoha scoffed. "Yeah, you'd also be DEAD." She tossed the core into the air, only to be swallowed by Ryuk.

"Computer? Almost my entire life, not to mention my job has to do with computers. So no, I'll pass." L took a sip of his tea.

Misa, still playing with her dolls did not answer. Kyoha took Light's pencil and started to poke her.

"Oh! Misa would say that she is grateful for saving her life! Misa thanks you, Gelus!" Misa kept playing with the dolls.

Ryuk chanted "APPLES. APPLES. APPLES. APPLES."

"From moonlightdemonKita:

_hi again -_

ok first i got presents for everyone - sends a homemade german apple cake for L, a 10 peice puzzle for Near, a family pack of chocolate bars for Mello, a carton of cigarettes for Matt, a bag of apples for Ryuuk, some random girly stuff for Misa, some randon things for Rem, and a rock for light  
now questions/comments  
L, i hope you like it - i made it myself its a family recipe  
Near, how long do you think that puzzle will take you?  
Misa, sorry i didn't get ya anything good i didn't know what you like and can i please please find you a guy who wont use you and isn't an ? you deserve better then that and you have a really pretty singing voice by the way -  
Mello, enjoy -  
Matt, i dont support smoking but i didn't know what else to get you  
Ryuuk, enjoy -  
Rem, yea i didn't really have any idea what to get you either  
Light, yea i still really dont like you but i didn't want to be completely rude so got you this nice shiny rock instead of nothing"

L took the cake and sliced it in half. He put the half aside for now. Ryuk stood right in front of L, but of course he didn't see. Then Ryuk leapt at the the cake and then it was gone.

"APPEL CAEK." he yelled. Then he took the bag of apples and started chanting "APPLE. APPLE. APPLE. APPLE."

Near took the puzzle and finished it in under 40 seconds. "That answer your question?"

Kyoha took some of the chocolate and started to chomp on it.

"I get a lousy rock, while they get the luxuries of their lives! How dare you-" Light began, but was interrupted by Kyoha.

"Yeah, yeah, "I R GOD, HEAR MEH RAWR." Hey, Light. Shut up."

Matt took his cigarettes lightly and tapped it. A single one slid out, and he stuck it in his mouth...

...but he couldn't smoke. He had no lighter! Matt started to sulk.

"From no heart to follow:

_Hey peoples! How bad does it suck to be trapped in a room by a mad-person??  
Who here has played over 50 different video games? Anyone who has gets a page from the death note I found under my bed! (I just like throwing the paper at people... haven't killed anyone yet)  
Mello: Are you religious? :points curiosly at rosary:  
Answer and you get a pet goldfish! (I owe chocolate to someone else and can't aford to give you any, sorry!)  
Light: Play dead boy! Play dead!  
Do so and I won't write your name in my Death note!  
L and Near: I want to have a staring contest with you! But since that's obviously impossible could you two have a one between yourselves?  
Winner gets about 10,0,0 toothpicks and a mango!  
Misa: Did you appricieate what Rem did at all?  
Answer and you get a picture of Light in the shower!  
Oh, and does anyone here want to buy a gameboy advanced? I need money for classified reasons or else I'll be brutally murdered!"_

Kyoha waved her hand in the air. "I did!" She cheered, but then looked at Matt. He sulked some more. "I only played 49..." Kyoha tucked the paper into her pocket. Mello seemed offended by the question.

"DAMN RIGHT I'M EFFING DAMN RELIGIOUS!" he yelled. Kyoha snorted. The goldfish plopped right on his dreadlocks. But it was dead. Oh well. Matt took it and swallowed it.

Light lay down on the floor, arranging his body to look dead.

"And thus, the staring contest of a million years began. L, the amazing detective against Near, the amazing detective's successor. Who's cuisine will reign supreme? Find out next on Iron Chef America!" Kyoha yelled. They stared at her.

"Of course Misa appreciates what Rem did for her!" Misa squealed.

About five hours later, the two where still at it. Kyoha snapped her fingers in front of both of them. L snored.

"They're... asleep... with their eyes wide open..." she muttered.

* * *

What they have:

Half a cake (eaten)  
10 piece puzzle of tiger  
10 piece puzzle of shark  
Picture of carelineparis' sister  
Cake (eaten)  
Lego  
Bar of Chocolate (eaten)  
Pencil  
Light and Misa doll  
Pamphlet for anger management (ripped up)  
Sandwich supplies  
Two small cakes (eaten)  
Tea (drunk)  
HTR13  
Grapples  
Homemade German Apple cake (eaten)  
10 piece puzzle  
Chocolate (half eaten)  
Carton of cigarettes  
Bag of apples (eaten)  
Random girly stuff  
Random stuff  
Rock  
Death Note page (Kyoha's)  
Goldfish (eaten)  
Picture of Light in shower


	4. Day 4

Author's Note: Holy shit. Nine reviews?! In one day?! Man, I was thinking a few days ago before I published this, "I think this is a bad idea." But look at all these glorious, glorious questions! Thank you so much! Anyway, I'm taking requests for short stories. Two spots. Maximum 10 pages 9 pt Arial. You tell me the plotline, characters and pairings via personal messaging. I won't do obvious yaoi and absolutely no lemon. Sorry, it's just that lemon scares/disturbs/distracts me. I have two questions for you guys to answer in your reviews this time:

Do you like my writing style?  
Do you want Mello torture in every chapter?

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. Wish I did, then Matt'd be mine.

* * *

Day Four

"We have a visitor today!" Kyoha was gluing hair extensions to Mello's locks, who was crying. "Meet carelineparis." The girl waved in the door, and stepped into the room. Light and L lunged at the door, but she slammed it shut.

"Hi! I'm here to do one and only thing. And lucky Light gets it!" she chirped. She turned around and her fist smashed into Light's jaw bone. "That's for making me fail my exams!" she yelled. She walked out the door.

"New questions!" Kyoha unrustled a long piece of paper.

"From Mujikau:

_Hm...just a few quick questions because all the smoke in my room is making me sleepy._

_Near - Since those puzzles are obviously way too easy for you, why don't you like switch the pieces around and make a shiger or a tark or something! Sometimes I think dumb people like me totally have the best ideas._

_L - Does your IQ have more digits than Pi?_

_Light - Have you ever accidentally shaved off one of your eyebrows? I want to get an answer from you that isn't self-righteous crap, so I'm asking something completely irrelevant._

_The first one to answer gets a magical monkey's paw and three wishes."_

Near stared at Kyoha. "I do not switch the pieces around because they won't fit." Near said simply.

"My IQ does not have more digits than Pi because Pi is an everlasting number." L stated. He plopped a cherry into his mouth.

Light's eyebrow twitched. "No, do you think that GOD would do something as idiotic as that?!"

"Wow, I think that was the shortest answering of questions ever. Usually one question turns into a ten minute conversation..." Kyoha said. "Next question!"

"From imEmoDealWithIt:

_L: whats your favorite type of cake?  
answer and I'll give you that cake and a cupcake!_

_light/kira: i truly admire your work as kira! in fact  
i wish to fallow in your footsteps any advice?  
answer and you shall get a misa voodoo doll_

_mello: are you gay?  
answer and I'll give you gay even if you say no! mwahaha_

_ryuk: would you ever make out with a apple?  
answer and I'll give you an orange_

_matt: do you love mello in a gay way(hey I rhymed hehe)_

_near: would you like a big hug from L  
answer and like give you lego people_

_misa:enjoy the pain of the evil voodoo"_

L said, "My favourite cake is triple chocolate with strawberry icing." The said cake fell from the sky and the cupcake fell down with it. Mello looked at the cake with puppy eyes.

"Fine." L sighed and sliced a piece for Mello. Mello squealed and hugged L, then ran off to a corner to eat.

"Um... Don't say 'I win' when you're not sure, don't trust Ryuk and wear tan jackets. Why? Because they're sexy." Light said. Kyoha stared and chucked a grapple at him. The fruit hit him in the head and knocked him out. She then ran over to him and kicked the unconcious body in various places. The voodoo doll fell down next to his head.

Mello was still wolfing down the cake and ignored the gay question.

(Ryuk and Rem are only there for laughs. Sorry!)

Matt blushed madly. "NO I DON'T!" Kyoha stopped punting Light and tackled Matt.

"That's good, 'cause you're mine!" she squealed, on top of him, sitting with her legs crossed.

"L used to give hugs to all of us when he visited the orphanage." Near stated plainly. Many lego people fell down and pelted Light on the head one by one. There were 30 of these lego people in all. If 13 of these already hit him, how many are left?

"From KaylaBirde:

_Applauses for you, I love and appreciate quick updates! A very nice update at that, which means that you get applause all the more. (Eek, I feel your pain with evil computers!)  
Much thanks for using italics, it helps my -one-track, easily confused- mind make more sense of things, and italics look quite spiffy if I do say so myself. A few questions weren't italicized, but that's 'k, it might just be my computer. Aye, I also think that the descriptions helped things along quite nicely, definitely gave scenes a more fleshed-out feel. And now...  
Questions, har, har!  
For L: What is your favorite food? Note that I said FOOD and not SWEET; sorry, but it can't be a dessert. For answering, he gets a bucket of cold water dumped on him! (Bwahaha.)  
For Matt: Have your smoking habits ever caused you any medical problems? 'E gets a lighter that doesn't work for answering.  
For Misa: Where on earth do you get those outfits?! They're cute, I suppose, but I've seen naught like them in stores. Um... Er... she gets a Light-plushie for answering. Yes. That's it."_

L stuck his thumb into his mouth. "...Cherries." Kyoha took a bottomless bucket and started dumping the icy neverending waterfall onto his head. Ice cubes were thrown in, too and pelted his hair, sliding off his head.

Matt stuck an unlit cigarette into his mouth. "No, I don't believe that I have any medical problems from smoking... I know that I have an eyesight problem from video games... These goggles have prescriptive lenses."

Misa, still playing with the Light doll, answered "Misa bought them online!" The Light plushie fell down and Misa made them make out, kiss and hug, etc.

"...Light's masturbating..." Kyoha whined. She had an idea, and whispered into Light's ear, "Hey. Kira's masturbating." Light shook awake and yelled "WHERE?!" but immediately got knocked out again from Kyoha kneeing him in the eye.

"From SasatheShy:

_Hello! Hey L, glad you liked the cake. Wha! 0.o 10 piece? No! They were supposed to be 10,0 piece puzzles. Me and my darn spelling typos, argh. oh well, anyway question for all the men:_

_Totally random but: Boxers or briefs? hehe_

_Light: Okay Light, since you complained I guess I have to ask you something. So... do you wear cologne and what kind? Haha_

_L: Sorry if I upset you last time about the 'zombie' thing. But I really love your walk, and just you individual and your way of sitting and all that! I just wanna say that you--are--awesome._

_So I heard since the Kira case, you were going to choose either Mello or Near to take your place if anything happened, but you didn't have enough time. If you did, who would you choose? you don't have to answer this one if it is private I jut know a lot of people are wondering._

_Near: Next to puzzles, dominos, dice, trains, and action figures all seen in the series What other types of toys, etc... do you enjoy? Do you like riddles?_

_Mello: Which is best? Rich chocolate or dark chocolate? ;p_

_Matt: How did you and Mello make friends at the orphange?_

_Misa: Have any good fashion tips, sweetie? Heh_

_So I have preasents. Lesse, a strawberry cake for L, a book titled "How to be the Perfect of Perfect Villains" for Light, four chocolate bars for Mello, a pack of his fave cigs for Matt, a large large large train set for Near to set up and play, and a fun girly make-up and doll dress-me kit for Misa to play with while trapped until Kyoha lets you out! :)_

_Bye for now!"_

"Boxers." L muttered.

"Briefs!" yelled Mello.

"Boxers with Link of them!" Matt chirped.

"Briefs..." Near stated.

"I GO COMMANDO!" Light yelled. He raised his head, but at the same time Kyoha swung the bucket at his head and he got knocked out again. (So much Light torture.)

Kyoha sniffed Light.

"Smells like Axe." she said. The book landed onto Light's head, hardcover spine first. Kyoha took it and opened it. She rolled over Light, and poised the book right over his nuts. Then, SLAM!

"I would choose both of them." L stated. A strawberry cake fell down and L dug in.

"I like rubber duckies and yes, I do like riddles." Near said, playing with the lego people in the fort. Then he started to put together the train set.

"Rich chocolate, duh!" Mello yelled. Four chocolate bars dropped down,

"We were roommates." Matt said. "He liked how I was 'sidekick material'." He took the smokes, but I repeat, NO LIGHTER.

"Is that what I said? I thought that I said that you were the perfect bitch to kick around." Mello said.

"Misa says that you should just be yourself!" Misa chirped. She dressed up the Light doll.

"That's all for today! Ask more questions... And you can ask me questions now, too! Bye-bee!" Kyoha waved.

* * *

Sorry I didn't get everyone! Gomen, gomen... I just so tired right now, I almost fell asleep with the computer on! Remember, answer the two questions and I'll try extra hard and fit all the remaining questions into the next one, plus the next reviews... -sigh- Never thought I'd say this, but... Please don't review unless you have advice! I'm sorry! Just wait for reviewing after chapter 5 is up! Don't worry, I'll add an extra day. Bye!


	5. Day 5

Author's Note: -sniff- Is this karma for not finishing all the questions? Ah, whatever. I have tons of time on my hands now. Just think of this as an extra long bonus chapter.

Disclaimer: Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata own Death Note.

* * *

Day Five

Kyoha, sitting on top of Matt who was down on all fours, was whipping his back. "Go horsey! Go!" she yelled.

"...How old are you again?" L stared at Kyoha's small stature.

"...12." (Not my real age! I'm actually... 14. :D) she answered.

"More questions!

From -BabyBubby-:

_Trys to break into room and fails- DAMMIT!_

Anyway, L:

1. Here is a senario: If your sliding down the ocean and your jet ski falls off, will it take the same number of pancakes to cover your dog house even if your arms grow 10 feet long?

Light:

2. MUST YOU BE SO EVIL?!

Mello:

3. I have some chocolate if you get me a picture of L...

Near:

OMG! you are so cute and small! -clears throat- Anyway, I have a riddle for you:

'I turn polar bears white  
And I will make you cry.  
I make guys have to pee  
And girls comb their hair.  
I make celebrities look stupid  
And normal people look like celebrities.  
I turn pancakes brown  
And make your champane bubble.  
If you sqeeze me, I'll pop.  
If you look at me, you'll pop.  
Can you guess the riddle?'

If you don't know the answer I will tell you next time :)

Here are some items I shall send you guys!

For L: A strawberry shortcake.  
For Misa: The lastest seventeen magazine.  
For Mello: ... Chocolate  
For Light: A packet of potato chips  
For Near: A 50 piece puzzle of a pretty sunset

BYE BYE! Kisses for all! -Blows Kisses-  
BB"

L's brain exploded from the question that was given to him. A strawberry shortcake fell down onto his head.

Light was still knocked out from the kneeing in the eye. Misa ran over to him and started to cry. A seventeen magazine plopped nearby and Misa squealed and opened it to read about stupid Lindsay Lohan. A bag a potato chips also fell but hit Light in the crotch.

Mello took Kyoha's HTR13 book and showed the L picture to her. But not for long, Kyoha took her whip and slapped Mello with it.

"Owww!" he yelled. Kyoha took a picture of L and gave it to Mello. Chocolate, glorious chocolate rained down and pelted Mello with it.

(Small brain bad riddle answers. Sorry!)

"Gifts from Neo-Kira:

_...Gifts for Lord Kira...  
A Death Note along with my personal Shinigami named Yami(for Ryuk to have company)  
For Lady Kira...  
A cellphone with unlimited minutes day, nights and weekends...  
For the reclusive L...  
A Mac book Air inside a manilla envelope...  
For Near and Mello...  
Mello gets five cartons of Cigs, Near, a Nintendo DS with Sudoku games as well as Brain Age 1&2  
For Kyoha...  
The Royal Prize of a lifetime...The Shinigami King's Death Note. Perhaps I shall catch the King himself and Deliver him to you as a gift...  
Ryuk...Ten bushels of apples and an empty snapple bottle..."_

The Death Note fell down and slapped Light with it. Kyoha took a look at him. Light's eyes opened and Kyoha screeched and jumped five feet from where she originally was. The shinigami knelt over to Kyoha and helped her up.

Misa stumbled around to catch the cell phone before it hit the ground. She squealed and started to call Nori, but she forgot that there's no reception in here.

L didn't notice the laptop flying down, and before he realized, it dropped and smashed into pieces. L sighed.

"What the eff am I going to do with effing cigarettes?!" Mello yelled. He chucked it at Matt. But still, tragically, he has 9 cartons of cigarettes, but no lighter! NO. LIGHTER.

Near inserted the sudoku game into the DS and started to play. In minutes he solved 4 sudoku puzzles and kept going, and going...

Another Death Note fell down and landed near Kyoha. She picked it up. "The Shinigami King's Death Note!" she yelled. She held it closely to herself and skipped over to Light to show off. Unfortunately, Yami appeared to have knocked him out again for startling Kyoha. She sighed.

"From XiaoEllen:

_I have my questions! Only if you answer them then I'll give you what I will have stated!_

_Question(s) for Light:_

_How DO you write with your pen as if you're swinging a katana?_

_Do you know your name spelt backwards is "Im-a-gay"?_

_Are you a gay? Kinda explains why you feel nothing for Misa-chan even though you've been with her for like what, six, seven years?_

_You get..._

_A pen, since you like writing so much;  
A book of previous mysterious crimes, and how great detectives had solved them._

_Question(s) for L-kun:_

_When did you eat your first sweet?_

_Were you an antisocial child?_

_Do you like Haagen Daaz ice-cream?_

_Do you see Watari-san as a father?_

_Between you and Mello-kun, who d'you think likes chocolate more?_

_You get..._

_A hug from me. :P  
Chocolates; (Mello, do not eat it. I repeat: Do NOT eat it)  
Two cakes (Half a meter in diameter each); Chocolate and Strawberry;  
A flask of coffee that automatically refills itself;  
A supply of sugar cubes._

_Question(s) for Misa-chan:_

_Light doesn't love you. No matter what you do, he won't love you. You know that right?_

_If Rem-san's a human male, would you love Rem?_

_If you'd have to date a person of this two, who would it be?_

_A, The REAL Ryuga Hideki  
B, Ryuga Hideki (A.K.A. Ryuzaki A.K.A. L.)_

_You get..._

_Light's hug and promise for a date; (I'm forcing you to do this, Light. Otherwise... evil grins)  
Some really nice Gothic Lolita clothes;  
A dress-up doll of Light (With clothings)_

_Question(s) for Near:_

_Do you know in Manga Chapter 109 you look like L with white and curly hair and in different clothing?_

_As in Manga Chapter 109, you have tarot cards. Do you know how to do fortune telling with those? (I know you don't bother, but do you know or not?)_

_Do you like playing with your L, Mello and Near finger puppets?_

_What kind of food do you eat? (I have never seen you eating, so many people assumed you eat toys, though they are inedible)_

_You get..._

_A complete set of Lego Characters and blocks of stuff seen from the anime; (As in, L, Misa, Light, and places they've been, like the main room of the HQ in which L had carried out his investigations)  
A 10,0-piece jigsaw puzzle of the Wammy House; (How long would you take to complete it?)  
A 10x10 Rubiks cube._

_XiaoEllen"_

Kyoha crouched down next to Light and nodded. "Light says, 'it's sexy', 'L's hot', and 'usage is sexy.'"

Light rolled over to his back and opened his eyes slowly. But before he could get up a pen flew down and stabbed him in the eye. He rubbed his eye, then a thick yellowing book fell down and slammed into his face.

L chewed his thumbnail. "I teethed on a chocolate coin... I still had friends... yes... no...Mello does."

Two cakes appeared side by side, followed by tons of chocolate that plopped on top, then sugar cubes and a flask of coffee landed delicately on top. But, it didn't land on the floor. It landed on L.

Misa thought for a moment. "I know that Light-kun won't love Misa, so Misa will make him!" Misa grinned. "Plus, I wouldn't want to date a scary creature like a shinigami, and I'll only date Light!"

"So, when will the date be?" Kyoha asked, as more clothes for Misa and another doll of Light fell down.

Misa gasped and took the three dolls and made them play with each other.

"...Light's having a threesome with himself..." Kyoha muttered, shielding her eyes.

Near said, "There isn't a chapter 109, so I have no idea what you're talking about... And no, I only kept the Near and Mello finger puppets. I eat food that you eat. Though Mello did force feed me a rubber ducky..." The Death Note Lego set fell down and Near started to recreate the story, ignoring the puzzle and rubiks cube.

"From BeyondL:

_The Beyond stands for Beyond Birthday, and the L is for my fav character._

_Matt: where did the vest come from?  
Light(Raito)Were you that bored enough to kill lots of people?  
L:What was Wammy's like when you were there?  
Mello:Do you like animals?  
Misa:Do you hate Ryuuzaki (L)?  
Near:Do you ever eat?_

_L, I know youre locked up with annoying people, but hugs,kisses, and sweets forever!"_

"...I bought this vest." Matt said, the cartons of cigarettes surronding him.

"...No, I only killed people because I felt that I had to." Light said, just waking up right now.

"Whammy's was just an orphanage that had very advanced schooling techniques. Nothing else." L answered.

Mello, who fished out his gold fish began to kill it with a lighter he found. "...What'd you say?"

"Misa doesn't not hate Ryuuzaki-kun!" Misa said.

Near stared. "Yes, I eat. If I don't, I wouldn't be here, would I?"

"From carelineparis:

_Yipee! I just found out I didn't fail! Ah well, punching him made me relieved._

So I just got 3 questions for three lucky guys!

For Matt: If you won a motorcycle what would it be if you answer it, I'll give you two PSPs with 10 games!

For bruised Light: (just thought of it last night)Wanna do DDR with me? (if you don't say yes I'll punch you again! -boxing gloves-)

And for L: I got you this new pair of jeans! Want it?

P.S.  
Yes Kyoha your writing is GOOD! XD!

And oh, can I torture Light this time pleease? :D!  
So we can be partners-in-making-torment! XD!"

Matt took a moment to think. "It would be a motorcycle that said MATT all over it." he said. "A red one." Two PSPS and ten games fell down and thus, began Matt's 100 hour marathon.

"Um... sure..." Light muttered. (carelineparis, what should I call you?) The girl slammed open the door again as Kyoha set up a large TV and two DDR mats. Light clumsily stepped on the arrows as the girl whizzed through and beat Light horribly. She gave L the new pair of jeans and Kyoha told her to take the three dolls...

Later, Light, fixed in place by Kyoha, watched as the three Light's suffered their love triangle with himself, played by carelineparis. At the end dress-up Light confessed his love to plush Light but plush Light actually loved Light doll. But then it turns out the Light doll was cheating on plush Light and was pregnant with dress-up Light's baby!

"Bye! Come back anytime!" yelled Kyoha, as carelineparis walked out the door.

"Now, where were we? Oh yeah...

From suberXxXduperXxXfun machine:

_OMG i just realised something 'yagami' spelled bacwarks is 'I'm a gay' LOL lights gay...  
ok questions...hm  
L do you ever eat anything besidess cake?  
answer and i'll give you...VEGITABLES (so you wont die of a heart attack...ahh the irony)  
so light ARE you a gay?  
answer and you get...um...my gratitude...yeah..and cake (now im being mean 2 L)  
near..er why do you like puzzles?  
answer and i'll give you...catnip  
mello i have advice for you...stop dressing as a transvetite:)  
well im about done lolz:D"_

"...I eat ice cream." L answered. Thick, green, leafy vegatables fell down and hit L one by one.

Kyoha thought of some more torture for Light. She grabbed a love potion she found somewhere. Light stood right in front of her and Kyoha forced the love potion down his throat. After a while, Light lunged for Kyoha, but Misa slapped him and started the cry. Kyoha started to run away as Light chased her around the room.

"Perfect torturrrrrrre!!" she yelled while still running.

"I like puzzles because it's challenging." Near said plainly. Catnip fell from the sky and hit him on the head.

Light caught Kyoha and was trying to kiss her but she slapped him to read the next question.

"From SekushiAi:

_Heyy!  
Hehehe i think this is heaps funny D although ive read these kinds of things and theyre generally pretty stupid, this one is good because you've incorporated a story-like theme to it.  
Your writing style it pretty good, too. The story can seem a little bit disorganised but that's to be expected, what with all the questions! Mello torture...hmm...definitely a nice idea. Although i think they should all be tortured XD and light definitely has to use that misa voodoo doll!  
--QUESTIONS.  
L: Will you pash Light? If you do, you get a chocolate cake with whipped cream and strawberries and chocolate sauce!  
Light: Have you ever thought about kissing L? (How could you not, handcuffed to that sexy little thing?) Answer truthfully (meaning yes, dude!) and you get a Near voodoo doll!  
Matt: Just gotta say you are awesome. So you get a lighter for your cigarettes!  
Mello: Is there any particular reason you dont like Near? Answer and get ten chocolate bars XD  
Misa: If Light was drunk would you take advantage of him? Answer and get a love potion wink wink  
Near: Do you consider yourself smarter than L? Answer and get a brick to do with what you please."_

(...What do you mean by pash...)

"Of course not! My kisses only belong to Kyoha-chaaaaaaaaaan!!" Light yelled.

"...Aw damn, it went to far. Time to call it off..." Kyoha grabbed the snapple bottle and smashed it on Light's head. He shook it off and kept chasing her. "HEEEEEEELP!!"

The precious lighter fell down to Matt's feet. He worshipped the object and lit one of his hoard of cigarettes.

Mello scoffed. "Cause I hate him! Duh!"

"...No..." Misa said quietly. A love potion fell down and Misa caught it. She forced it into Light's mouth and Light just kept chasing Kyoha.

"I FEEL LIKE MY LOVE FOR YOU HAS GROWN STROOOOONGER!" he yelled and grabbed Kyoha.

"No..." Near grabbed the brick and chucked it at Light, but he dodged it. He pinned down Kyoha onto the floor.

"I THINK HE'S RAPING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE..."

* * *

Hope you like this long, long long chapter! TRY TO AVOID QUESTIONS PLEEEEASE!


	6. Sorry!

I apologize deeply for not updating enough lately. Do you know what homework is? Well, I had two projects due this past week and I have three big exams this next week. So, expect updates next week. And to make this part fic, I introduce some swatches of the fic that has been up for a week, Light is Drunk!

* * *

"MASTURBATION!" Light roared, forcing Sayu away with his breath. His friends looked at each other, sharing the same expression. Amusement.

"IIIIIIIICEEEE CREEEEEAAAM..." he growled, banging the table with his fist. "ICE CREAM ALL OVER KIRA'S DRANKSITNG!" This scared Sayu. But then again, I would be scared too.

-x-

"**NO! **IT'S **MY **BIRTHDAY AND **I **WANNA HAVE **FUN! **F IS FOR FRIENDZ WHO DO STUFFZ TOGETHERZ... U IS FOR YOUZ AND MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE... N IS FOR ANYWHEREZ AND ANYTIMEZ AT ALLZ DOWN HEREZ IN THE DEEP BLUE SEAZ..." Light pounded the table to the beat of the 'song'.

-x-

"C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G SONG! C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G SONG! IF YOU DON'T THINK THAT YOU CAN SING IT FASTER THEN YOU'RE WRONG... BUT IT'LL HELP IF... YOU JUST SING ALOOOOOOOOOOOOONG... C'MON DAD! LET'S SING! C-A-M-" Light boomed while being led to the car by Soichiro.

* * *

Thank you! I'll finish one chapter and scoop up all the reviews all at once over this weekend. Bye!


	7. Announcement

It's April 30th, the day that I promised that they'd be let out. But...

-drumroll-

Haha! I'm leaving them in there til the end of July! Take that, Death Note characters!


	8. Day 6

Author's Note: Yaaay! I've finally passed all the school projects. One thing though... I've another big socials project on Ancient Egypt the next month. So, before the project is in full swing, here is finally Day 6! D:

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note. I do, however, own Kyoha. :D

* * *

...Oh shoot, I have a page and a half full of questions to cover...

The Death Note cast has been long awaiting that fateful day. Finally, the torture is over. They obviously didn't hear Kyoha's announcement earlier today. Kyoha's love potion has worn off, finally, and everybody was looking forward to sleeping in their own beds for the first time in a month.

"Hey, guess what?!" Kyoha asked cheerfully.

"What..." Mello sighed, who has already gone through all the prize chocolate he had won.

"I'm keeping you guys til July!" She looked proud of herself.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."

"First question!

_From moonlightdemonKita:_

_whee hi again -  
Near: whats your favorite type of food? all i ever see you with is toys and even though i read this funny rant that matsuda makes about the unhealthy eating habits of the deathnote characters that says you probably eat your toys i seriously doubt that  
L: what was your favorite game when you were a kid?  
Mello: have you ever been in love with anyone?  
Light: do you regret finding the deathnote seeing how everything ended up? i dont really believe that you could actually be all that evil just misunderstood and i'm done torturing you for killing L now and using everyone although i'm still unhappy about both of those i'll be nice cause i probably would've turned into a crazy psychotic too if i had the same views as you and got the tool to try to make it better  
Matt: whats your favorite game? do you like rpgs or fighting games better?  
Misa: whats your favorite movie?  
Kyoha: who is your favorite deathnote character? and could you please capture matsuda? i think he's awesome not nearly as great L but still  
okay presents  
for L a jar of cherries  
for Near a jigsaw puzzle that is supposed to have at least a hundred ways to be put together  
for Mello a bag of dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate and truffles  
for Matt a working lighter and a ds lite with a few random games  
for Light a written peace treaty for him to sign with a stamp to confirm it instead of my name just incase and a cookie cause i dont know what else to get ya still  
for Misa more girly stuff  
for Kyoha a plushie of her favorite character  
and more apples for Ryuk and random stuff for Rem"_

"Oh, you read SilentReaper's comics too? They're seriously funny." Kyoha commented, sucking on sugar cubes.

"No, I don't eat my toys. Though, Mello did blend rubber duckies and forcefed them to me, once." Near answered, playing with the random toys that he had. All of the puzzle pieces, one by one, fell onto Near's head, making a snapping noise everytime one collided with his skull.

"Tic-Tac-Toe." L took one of Kyoha's sugar cubes and shoved it down his throat. A jar of cherries fell down and crashed onto L's head.

Mello shook his head. "No! Never! Gawd, I'm not that soft that I like somebody in that way! What the hell are you people thinking these days, sometimes I seriously don't-" A slap was heard, and Kyoha resumed her sugar sucking. Mello looked up at a sky and a huge bag of chocolate fell onto his face, bruising his eyes.

Light blinked and opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Then he grabbed his throat, trying to scream, but he was still mute.

Kyoha then said, "Oh yeah. All that screaming he did gave him 7 day laryngitis. Sorry."

"Are you kidding?! RPG are waaaaay more awesome than fighting games! My favourite RPG is the Legend of Zelda series." Matt's cigarette flew out of his mouth and he got another one and lit it. Then the lighter and the DS fell onto his head, a large snap being heard.

"Of course Misa's movie!" Misa squealed, then said a line from her movie. A basket fell down gently in front of her, cosmetics and nail polish falling, lining up in a row inside the cushioned basket.

Kyoha lept onto Matt, who yelled out and said, "Matty, of course! I even named my cell phone after him!" A Matt doll fell down and Kyoha grabbed it eagerly.

"_From LOVEintheSNOW:_

_Hey, everyone! You guys can call me Dana._

_Light: If you hadn't come across the Death Note, would you still deliver justice in another way?  
--I kind of feel bad that people are picking on you. So, I'll give you a hug, and some shampoo to keep that hair gorgeous...and some boxers. Please, put them on._

_L: Were you born an isomniac? Or is it from all the sweets, caffeine, and hard work you do? Also, if you had to be chained to one other person besides Light, who would you choose?  
--You are my favorite character, so...here's some cake, a blanky to keep you warm, a nice hug, and some tea!_

_Misa: You have a really pretty voice and I love your song! Anyway, is there anyone besides Light that you would do ANYTHING for?  
--Hehe, you get a Light voodoo doll, some makeup, and a hug!_

_Mello: Did you have a really tragic past or something that makes you so cranky? Well, I think you should flip through that handy anger-management manual.  
--You get some REALLY tight pants, a hug because I feel bad for being mean to you, and a water gun...have fun!!_

_Matt: I love your sweater and goggles :) If you were to suddenly just disappear and never come back, what would your last words be to Mello?  
--Here, a huge pack of cigarretes, some fancy BLUE goggles, a hug, and some games for your new DS."_

Light furiously wrote down on a piece of paper that Kyoha gave him: "I WOULD BECOME A POLICE OFFICER." A shampoo bottle hit him in the worst place possible: his crotch. Somehow, the bottle sailed through the air and, at the same time, Light leaned back. Bam. Light screamed in pain with no sound coming from his mouth. He stared at the ceiling, clutching his crotch, and then a pair of boxers fell like a box of bricks was in it. It fit right over Light's head, thus suffocating him. /Light torture is back in full swing, baby!/

L chewed on his fingernail. "It is from all the sweets I eat... And I would not mind being chained to that pretty baker..." The cake splatted onto his face, the blanket fluttering down and afterwards the tea landing on top of it. But where was the teapot? An amoeba of some sort of the transparent brown liquid splashed onto the blanket.

Misa smiled. "Thank you! And Misa would do anything for Rem, since she helped Misa find Light in the first place." The Light voodoo doll and makeup piled up in the cushioned basket.

Mello stopped rubbing his swelling eyes and his swelling eyes started to tear up. He stood up and walked to the corner where he started to cry about the loss of his parents. The tight pants flew down and wrapped around Mello, also suffocating him. Then the water gun dropped onto his head.

Matt said, "Bye." Kyoha laughed, but then ducked out of the way as the goggles, games and cigarettes piled onto Matt's poor head.

"From Neo-Kira:

_I Can I take them? I'm calling mine Death Note Cast Deathtrap which is like if the cast were in s SAW movie type of trap except reviewers could issue challenges. It would be hilarous.  
Here Old man King for ya. And you have NO idea how hard it was to catch, i mean i had to buy a box, string, a pack of reeses peices(if ya don't get the gag, its from Family Guy) Okay! Now back into character...  
...Neo-Kira bares questions and Gifts...  
L...Do you remeber your parents...L recieves a plates of assorted caks and chocolates to share with Mello, Near and Matt...  
Light...Do you miss your Family?...Light recieves a cattleprod to uses on L, Misa and anyone else who annoys him...  
Misa...Why would you allow L to take your cell phone?(i.e Tohou U, 'someone touched my butt')  
Misa gets a new dark gothy dress..."_

Kyoha squealed. "Yay! Thank you!" The shinigami followed her around.

L said through the blanket, "All I remember is a big fire and my parents screaming for help." He sighed. "If only they remembered it's stop, drop and roll, not roll, stop then drop... They dropped into the basement where the fire started..." He took off the blanket and laid it on the floor to catch the plates of cakes and chocolate.

Light shook his head and the cattleprod fell down, unfortunately hitting him on the electric part, thus electricuting him.

Misa looked startled. "Heh?! He took Misa's cell phone?!" The dress fluttered down and Misa put it on.

"From Mez the revengeful:

_-glomps Mello and sobs- Why is everyone being so mean to you?! You're the BEST character in the series, and way better than Near!_

...Oh right, questions... Erm, Mello, what shampoo do you use? Oh, and is it okay that I'm 'borrowing' your apartment while you n' Matt are away?

The 'correct' answers will get you: A hair styling kit(so you can get rid of the dreadlocks), a gun(with no bullets), and a KITTY!"

Mello yelled, "NO IT IS NOT OKAY THAT YOU ARE BORROWING MY APARTMENT!" No gifts fell down.

"Matsuda!! You're fired!" Kyoha yelled.

"Awww..." the new intercom voice said.

Kyoha shook her head. "Out! Now! At least every guy here has a concussion!"

Matsuda groaned some more. Then he shuffled out of the building.

* * *

:D


End file.
